J Segal Design- Design a Life

During this recent government shutdown, I have not so far encountered any shuttered government services in a time of need, but there are many things in the world that shut down. Most businesses shut down daily. Most holidays cause Monday shutdowns of banks and the post office. Too much snow can even trigger the need to hire babysitters on what would otherwise be a school day. Luckily, sitters work flexible schedules. I’m a few days from my 55th birthday, and have been spending an excessive amount of time lately, what little time I have left, waiting out the shutdowns. I’m doing it right now, since it’s Sunday. And while making a call list for Monday morning, I realized that having cooled my jets last weekend on an inquiry, I had forgotten to call that company during business hours and now am in a second weekend holding pattern to call about a car part. Sure, I can order a car part over the internet, but to ship a fender, the part in question, costs quadruple the cost of the part ...

I miss Bob. For what it’s worth, I still miss Bob. What a strange expression that is, “For what it’s worth.” It begs the question, I suppose. What is it worth? What is the value of the statement that I miss Bob? Still. “I” miss Bob. Who he was, what we were, and what we had is unique to me. Others miss him, also, and their grief is as valid as mine. I’m not special in missing him, but I was special to him, and he was so to me. Whenever others attempt to describe me and us, I tend to wince. Nobody seems to get it, not that they need to. I don’t recall feeling that Bob was wrong about me. That he was confused or naive, even when I lied to him. I “miss” Bob. There are moments when I sort of automatically want to share a thought or accomplishment with him, as I have done for the last 27 years. But he’s not here to share with. He’s not watching. He can’t encourage or discourage me. Not directly, anyway. Any influence he has on my life now comes from views he expressed from the past. ...

Its January, and every year at this time HGTV, Home and Garden Television, gives away a fabulous home built over the previous year and featuring the latest and greatest styles and products the industry has to offer. These homes tend to be located in idyllic vacation spots and get more elaborate every year. In fact, this year’s home package is valued at 2.3 million dollars. I’ve been a fan of HGTV from the start, which was in 1994. Yikes! The 90s were a boom time for real estate, new construction, and home remodelling. Mortgage interest rates plummeted, so many people bought homes or got loans to remodel current homes. These people craved information and advice on building, decorating, even buying and selling. HGTV built a network entirely devoted to these matters, and I was hooked. Looking back, I’m charmed by their humble beginning. And I still recall all those amazing, beautiful homes. Their website, in fact, still has details and photos on every home they’ve built, and today...

Lately I’ve noticed that I’ve been getting looks in public, and not necessarily the good kind. As I move through public spaces, I tend to keep my head up and make eye contact with others I pass by. It has always been important to me to hold me head up rather than shrink, hide or demure. Jordan Peterson even has a rule about this. Act as if I’m somebody who matters is roughly what he says. One of the challenges in this approach is that one can sense whether they (pc pronoun use) are being generally approved of- accepted or rejected on appearance. I’m a very visually oriented person, so I’m keen on the give and take of these visual signals. In my head, it’s, “ How do I look? How am I doing? How am I being received?” This informal polling data will guide my future fashion choices. So as the season has turned chilly, I’ve been searching for my Winter Look. The clothes, coats, pants I will be wearing this season. Part of this season’s styling for me is the wig and hat. Hats are warm, ...